Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Dear Santa...

After ANOTHER hiatus, I am linking up with Mama Kat for her Pretty Much World Famous Writing Workshop.

Assignment: Write a letter to Santa and let him know what you'd like to see under your tree this year.

Dear Santa:

How are you doing?  I bet you are super tired and so ready for the holiday season to be over!  You must work you a$$ off to get toys to all those little boys and girls around the world and unfortunately, many of them are likely appreciative little tyrants.  I promise to never complain about any job I might acquire again.  PROMISE.

I hate to write to you on such short notice but I was reminded by a fellow mommy blogger, Mama Kat, that adults can ask you for a few "wish lists" items too.  It's been so many years since I took the time to write to you, even to just say "HI"...sorry 'bout that.  It almost seems a little selfish and self centered that the minute I "want" something, you're this first person that comes to mind.  In all fairness, you can't really blame me becuase you made every single one of my dreams come true as a child.  Man, you were so generous.  Did I ever say thank you?  Gosh I hope so, if not, THANKS A MILLION. 

I know you are one busy dude so I wont take up to much more of your time.  I am kinda beating around the bush as I am not one to make special requests for myself.  I am more of a giver than receiver.  Not that I don't "get" things from others, I am just way more comfortable being on the giving end of things than the receiving end.  Anywho, I am just gonna put this out there and see if I have fallen on that "Good List" of yours, or not.  (If I AM on the naughty list, I am 99.9% I can explain, please give me a holler before just writing my requests off...pleezzee.)

Here are a few "things" I would really, REALLY, R.E.A.L.L.Y appreciate under my tree this year.  You know, if your not too exhausted and of course, used up all your "magic dust"...

  • One extra hour added to each day.  I just seem to have more things on my "To-Do-List" than time allows.
  • One day added to each week.  Again, another day would elevate so much of the above mentioned list.
  • Now that I think about it and while you are magically adding time to the world, how's about adding one more month to the calendar year.  Not only is my "To-Do-List" HUGE, I am getting old way too fast and I want a little more time on this glorious planet.  AND, it's not just a gift for me, it's for everyone.  You included.  It's a WIN-WIN-WIN if you ask me! (See, I AM a giver...your welcome.)
  • I'd love a "look" that "works".  You know the one I am talking about dontcha big guy?  The "look" that tells my kids "I've had enough...that's enough...ENOUGH!".  One that actually works like ALL.THE.TIME. I'd ask you for some personalize message but I know that wont work when they are 40 years old like my mom's "look" does to this day with me.   I am thinking like an instructional video or something like that?!?!?! (If it's some kinda mask or something...that would work too!  I am not picky just desperate.)
  • A Robot Slave Helper. I hear that this whole "IRobot" age is coming soon so, I am thinking you might be able to use your contact list and get me a prototype (not a totally out-of-control one, if you can help it).  I'd be more than willing to sign some kinda disclosure that I wont leave my Robot alone with the kids (unless it's an emergency) to "test" out it's cleaning, cooking and errand running capabilities.  Again, it's kinda a gift for others too because I could be the guinea pig for mothers around the world.  I'm just saying...
  • With all the advances in robotics, I am sure "they" have come up with some kind of invisible shield that could protect my children from all the dangers in the world.  It would really help me sleep better at night and might even elevate some of my anxiety that I am sure is the cause of my psoriasis condition.  If they can spare a 3rd invisible shield, I'd like one for Daddy Dave too because I am pretty sure I am not cut out for single parenting ( and because I DO really love him...LOTS!).
  • I know this is a list of impossibilities...or is it???  In the event that it IS I'd appreciate a box really good bottle of red wine or two.  It will help me feel like there is more time, provide me with a "look"  that may work (likely a bit scary but whatever!), motivate me to manage the house (ok, maybe not) and while it won't protect my family, it might make me forget about the lurking dangers around every corner .

Thanks Santa.  You're the best.  

Love Always,

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Mama’s Losin’ It


  1. You are, Sister!


    (You weren't hitting the box / bottle as you wrote this, were you???) ;)

  2. Oh Yes, Yes, Yes!! Me too! Me too! I want all these things...the look that actually works on my kids, the invisible shield that would put my worrying mind to rest, the robot slave...ALL of it!

    Judging by your list, my list and many of the others I read, it's no wonder poor ol' Santa caters to the kids and NOT the adults! :O

  3. Yes, please, a robot slave or just a maid. I'm not picky.



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